Grimm Tales of Wonderland
by Lorelle
Summary: While visiting the Hatter Mansion, Alice stumbles across a book from her childhood. Soon enough, everyone wants her to read them a story! One by one, the role-holders each take the lead in a famous fairy tale from the Brothers Grimm. Discover which character is cast in which story! (Alice x All)
1. Prologue

Alice ran a finger along the spines of the many books contained within the Hatter's personal library. Though it wasn't long ago that Peter brought her to the Country of Hearts, the Outsider had already managed to befriend Wonderland's powerful role-holders. Blood Dupre, the notorious mafioso, sat at his desk behind two large stacks of documents awaiting his signature. Only the occasional scratch of pen on paper and the soft shuffle of Alice's feet disturbed the peaceful silence. Her eyes roamed the packed shelves before landing on a familiar title. A surprised gasp escaped her lips. Blood's head rose incrementally, his eyes lighting up with new-found interest.

"Has the young lady found something to her liking?" His lips curled around the words in a lazy smile.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to disrupt your work," Alice clasped her hands in front of her apron, not daring to reach for the book. However, the gentleman languidly rose to his feet and strode across the room. Folding his arms across his chest, he leaned against the bookcase with no intention of letting the matter go. "It's just... I saw a book that my sister would read aloud to me when I was a little girl." Drawing the book from its hiding place, she held it out for him to see (and putting some much-needed space between them).

"Grimm's Fairy Tales?" Taking hold of the book, Blood flipped through the pages. "So they have this book in your world as well, do they?" When he came to the last page, he returned it to her expectant hands. The light which streamed through the open window changed suddenly from a crisp white to deep gold.

"It's getting late. I had better get back to the Clock Tower before Julius worries..." Before she could take a step forward, Blood's arm barricaded her into the corner. His eyes narrowed on hers, their typical green hue flashing an ominous jade.

Leaning forward, his lips brushed against her ear. "Now we wouldn't want that, would we?" Drawing back, he took a strand of her honey-blonde hair and placed a delicate kiss to it. His words, his eyes, his lips- they were all a sinful invitation for trouble. She could feel the heat rising in her cheeks. Alice wrapped her arms around the book, holding it tightly against her chest. Blood chuckled, enjoying her reaction to his advances. Slowly, he took a step back and released her hair. "I can see that you're quite attached to the book. Go ahead and borrow it. I'm sure you could use some entertainment, being cooped-up at that open grave." Blood turned on his heel and settled himself back into his chair, his eyes still on the petite girl.

"Thank you!" With a huff, Alice marched out of the room and slammed the door shut behind her.

The Hatter drew his arms up behind his head and relaxed into his chair. "I find myself more and more interested. How very curious." A devilish grin played across his lips.


	2. The Twins' Story

Alice stormed out of the massive, top hat-adorned structure. "What is **wrong **with him?! It's as if Blood enjoys toying with my feelings! Arrgh!" No sooner had she reached the gate when two raucous voices called out from the distance.

"Brother, it's the Lady!"

"Heya, Lady! Where're you going?"

Dee and Dum ran full-speed toward Alice, sandwiching her in a tight hug. Two pairs of eyes, one blue and one red, stared at her in accusation. "You're not leaving, are you? We wanna play!" The twins locked arms with Alice as if to restrain her.

"Yeah! That stupid chickie rabbit wouldn't let us come see you. Won't you stay just a bit longer?" Dee began to nuzzle her shoulder pleadingly and Dum quickly followed suite. Alice held back a laugh. It never ceased to amaze her how volatile this particular pair of role-holders could be- one moment they would slaughter anything on two legs, the next they would smother her with childish affection.

"I suppose I could stay a little while longer... Ah!" Glancing down, Alice realized that her hands were empty. "Have either of you seen a red book with gold writing on the cover?" She began to fidget anxiously, panicked at the thought that she had lost Blood's book. Both boys relinquished their hold and scoured the ground around them.

"I found it, Pretty Lady!" Dum triumphantly raised the book in the air. Dee raced to his brother's side, eager to see what treasures the book held. They turned the book over and over in their hands, inspecting it with great curiosity. Suddenly, a thought struck them.

"Will you read us a story?!" Without waiting for a response, the Tweedles dragged Alice under the shade of a near-by tree and set the book in her lap. Each cuddled up to one side of the Foreign girl. Heaving a sigh, she resigned herself to the idea that she would have to return to the Tower the next morning.

Alice opened the book to the index, skimming the names of the different stories it contained. Finally, she found one she felt would be appropriate for the "Bloody Twins" and flipped to the correct page. Clearing her throat, somewhat nervously, she read the story title aloud. "This is the tale of 'Hansel and Gretel'..."

* * *

"Hansel and Gretel"...

_Near a large forest there lived a woodcutter with his wife and his two children from a former marriage. The boy was called Hansel and the girl Gretel. The family was very poor and had precious little to live on. And at one time, when there was a great famine in the land, the woodcutter could not even procure their daily bread..._

* * *

"Boooo!"

"Boring!"

After only the first few lines, the twins were restless. "You don't like the story?" Alice was caught off-guard by their immediate rejection. The boys mirrored each other's distaste, sticking out their tongues in feigned disgust.

"Can't it be about two **brothers**?" Dee had taken hold of one side of the book, while Dum grabbed the other.

"Yeah, Lady! Make it about twin brothers!" The book quivered in Dum's hand as he bounced in place.

Alice brought a thoughtful finger to her lips, considering how best to retell the story. "Alright then," she reclaimed the book from the Twins' grasp, "This is the tale of 'Hansel Dee and Hansel Dum'..."

* * *

... or "Hansel Dee and Hansel Dum"

_On the outskirts of a large forest, there lived a moody, vain, and incredibly self-centered woodcutter. He lived in a modest cottage with his rabbit-eared companion and his twin children. The boy with shining blue eyes was called Hansel Dee and the brother with bright red eyes was called Hansel Dum. The family was very strange indeed- they bickered constantly among themselves, yet they complimented one another perfectly. Unfortunately, the Hatters (as they were called by their neighbors) were very poor and had precious little to live on. When a great famine struck the land, the woodcutter could not even procure his daily cup of tea which made him unbearably irritable._

_Late one evening, after the children had been put to bed, the woodcutter sat at the kitchen table with his subordinate. A long silence passed between them. Finally, the woodcutter sighed and turned to the other man, "This famine has become an inconvenience. It has made procuring tea a far greater hassle than I care to bother with."_

_The hare, named Elliot, admired his boss with all his heart- er, clock- so much so, that he would do more than his fair share of the woodcutting. So when he heard of his boss' troubles, he thought hard to find a solution. Soon, he had an idea._

_"I'll tell you what, Blood," Elliot addressed the woodcutter, "We'd be a hell of a lot better off if we ditched those damn brats! It'd be two less mouths to feed and they're always slacking off on their chores anyway!"_

_The woodcutter turned the idea over in his head. He knew the hare would not leave him in peace if he didn't make a decision. "Fine. We'll take them out into the woods tomorrow morning with some bread and be done with the matter." As both men climbed the staircase to their bedrooms, neither one noticed the two small faces peeking at them from behind the twins had overheard the conversation that transpired between the woodcutter and the hare._

_"Ah, nuts! This totally blows, Brother," Hansel Dee whispered. "That pissy rabbit is gonna leave us in the woods. What're we gonna do?"_

_Hansel Dum had been thinking intently the entire time. "Don't worry, Brother. I have an idea," He drew Dee closer to him, resting his hands on his brother's shoulders, "I'll use the bread the boss gives us to leave a trail of crumbs behind. When the moon comes out, the crumbs will lead us home."_

_At daybreak, before the sun had risen, Elliot burst into their room and roused the twins awake. "Get up, you little stains! We're going into the forest to fetch wood." He gave them each a piece of bread, "Here's something for your dinner. Don't eat it before then, 'cause you're not getting anymore!"_

_The family then made their way to the forest. Once they had gone a few yards, Hansel Dum stopped and looked back at the cottage, and he did the same thing again and again. Eventually he fell behind the group._

_"What are you stopping to look back at, Hansel Dum?" Blood the woodcutter dug his walking-stick into the ground, waiting for an answer._

_"I'm lookin' at my cat, it's sittin' on the roof."_

_"Jackass! That's not a cat! It's light from the sun hitting the chimney," the hare interjected._

_"Nuh uh! It's totally a cat," Dee came to his brother's defense._

_"Shaddup! You pipsqueaks are nothin' but trouble!" Elliot spat back._

_"Boo! Suck an egg, stupid rabbit!" Dee countered._

_"Keep it down. All of you," Blood sighed, "Working so early in the day is miserable enough- you're bickering is only making it worse."_

_"You heard the boss!" Elliot's ears stood pin-straight on top of his head, "Pipe down!"_

_"Elliot, screaming at them doesn't make it any quieter," Blood mumbled, nursing his head in his free hand._

_Squabbling aside, Hansel Dum had not actually been looking at the cat. He had strewn a handful of bread crumbs on the ground each time he stopped._

_When the Hatters reached the middle of the forest, the woodcutter turned to the children, "Now, boys, go collect some sticks to make a fire."_

_Hansel Dee and Hansel Dum gathered as many sticks as their arms could carry and soon made a huge pile. Their eyes danced with glee as the pile was lit and blazed into the air._

_"We're going to cut wood. You two little snots stay here until we come back to get you. Ya got that?" Elliot loomed over the children, pressing his hands to his hips in true maternal fashion._

_"Yeah, yeah. Whatever, chicken bunny!" The Hansels brushed off the hare's orders with a wave of their hands._

_"Hmph!" Elliot stomped off and out of sight. The brothers huddled together by the fire, and when dinner-time came Dee shared his slice of bread with Dum. Feeling cold and still hungry, the twins decided to take a nap to forget their troubles. Time passed rather quickly in this enchanted land and so the evening turned to night; however, no one came to fetch the two small boys._

_It was pitch black all around when they awoke. Hansel Dum took his brother's hand and tried to cheer him, "Just wait, Brother. When the moon comes out, we'll be able to see the bread crumbs and they'll show us the way home."_

_Soon enough, the moon peered out from behind the clouds. They started for home, but found no bread crumbs. While the boys slept, all the hundreds of birds in the forest had picked up the crumbs and eaten them. They walked the whole night and all the next day searching for an exit. Try as they might, the Hansels only traveled deeper and deeper into the woods._

_At midday they spied a beautiful, snow-white bird singing gaily on the bough of a tree overhead._

_"Brother, look!" Hansel Dee yanked at his twin's sleeve, pointing excitedly at the innocent creature. "Let's kill it!"_

_"Yeah! We'll kill it, then we'll eat it!" Hansel Dum retrieved his axe from... from- well, wherever they store their weapons- and transformed it into a handgun. Taking aim, he shot at the bird where it perched. The tiny animal fluttered its wings and took flight._

_"Crud!" The twins ran after the bird, firing round after round. However, their bullets could not strike the white bird._

_They chased the bird till they came to a little cottage, where it settled down on the roof. As Hansel Dee and Hansel Dum drew nearer, they discovered that the house was made of bread and roofed with cake. Even the windows were made of a transparent sugar. The brothers froze, overcome by their hunger and their desire._

_"Woooow," they breathed. Exchanging a look of awe, Dee and Dum threw themselves upon the house._

_"Ha ha ha! This is awesome!" Dum exclaimed between mouthfuls of roof cake. Dee smashed a window pane, gnawing on the shattered pieces of sugar._

_All at once, the door opened and an old, old woman came hobbling out on a crutch. Hansel Dee and Hansel Dum were so frightened that they dropped the sweets they held in their hands._

* * *

"Barf!" Dee and Dum clutched their stomachs and doubled over.

Irritated by the second interruption to the story, Alice snapped the book shut. "All right, then. If you're going to continue to interrupt the story, I may as well stop reading!"

"Laaaady..." The twins knelt before Alice, mere inches away and with tears in their eyes. "D-do you hate us now?"

Alice swallowed and droplets of sweat rolled down her face. "I-" Her head drooped down in defeat, "Of course I don't."

"Yay! We loooove you, Nice Lady!" The Tweedles threw their arms around her neck and waist.

After a few moments, the twins drew back. Dum returned the book to Alice's lap, opening to the page where the story had left off.

"We like your story, Nice Lady! Really!" Dee insisted, resting his head in Alice's lap.

"Yeah! We really do!" Seeing that her lap was taken, Dum laid his head on her shoulder, "We just wish you were in it too."

A faint blush colored Alice's cheeks. She could feel her will crumbling under their adoring gaze. She smiled at each of the boys. "Fine. I'll continue the story, but you have to promise there will be no more interruptions." They nodded their heads fervently and curled up closer.

Clearing her throat, Alice began the story again. "As I was saying..."

* * *

_All at once, the door opened. Hansel Dee and Hansel Dum dropped the sweets they held in their hands. A young woman, not much older than themselves, stepped out of the house._

_"Wh-what are you doing?!" The girl cupped a hand over her mouth, "Please! Stop eating my house!"_

_The twins watched the girl as she moved frantically about the house, assessing the damage they had done. They could feel their clocks ticking faster, enjoying the flustered look on her face._

_Without warning, both boys launched themselves at the unknown woman._

_"Pretty Lady!" They cried, hugging her close and petting her all over. Their smiles grew wider when they saw the girl blush a bright shade of red. _

_"Wait... Wait!" She shoved them back at an arm's distance. "Where are your parents? Surely they're worried about you?"_

_Hansel Dum kicked at the dirt. "Eh, the boss left us alone in the woods 'cause he couldn't afford to feed us." All of the color drained from the young woman's face. "What's wrong, Lady?! Oh no! Are you sick?" The twins rushed to her side, feeling her forehead and stroking her hair. Then, tears trailed down her face._

_"We're sorry! We didn't mean to make you cry!" _

_The woman wiped at her eyes with the back of her hand. "No, no. That's not it! It's just... I can't believe someone would abandon you like that!" She wrapped her arms around the twins. "Please, come inside."_

_She took the children by the hand and led them into the little house, "By the way, what are your names?"_

_"I'm Hansel Dee."_

_"I'm Hansel Dum."_

_"It's nice to meet you, Dee and Dum. My name is Alice."_

_Inside the cottage, the table was set for dinner and a fire crackled in the fireplace. "Are you boys hungry?" _

_"Oh, yes!"_

_But before Alice could step into the kitchen, two small arms coiled around her chest. "We're veeeery hungry..." Dee nestled his chin into the crook of her neck._

_"We want somethin' sweet..." Dum hugged her from the front, wrapping his arms around her waist. Alice was trapped._

_"H-Hey!" She attempted to sound authoritative, yet her words came out weak and breathless. The twins tickled her skin with feather-light kisses, occasionally nipping her ear and licking her neck. The warmth of the fire and the touch of their sticky fingers flooded Alice's senses._

_"The Lady is so nice, Brother," Dum planted one last, chaste kiss on Alice's cheek before hugging her gently._

_"We love the Nice Lady," Dee captured her other cheek with his lips, easing his hold on her._

_"Lady...?"_

_"Yes, Dum?"_

_"Can we stay with you forever?"_

_"Brother an' I will beat up any bad guys who try to hurt you!" Out of nowhere- seriously, where do they hide those things- Dee produced an enormous axe._

_"We'll keep you safe!" Dum drew his own axe and touched the razor-sharp edge to his brother's. Alice grimaced at the loud clang of the metal tips colliding._

_"So, can we stay...?" The twins' eyes glistened with tears that threatened to spill over. Despite the massive tools of death they carried, Alice could only see two small children in need of a home._

_"I would like that very much."_

_The boys rejoiced and, once again, showered their new friend with playful kisses._

_So all their troubles came to an end. Truth be told, Alice had been lonesome while living in the woods (for she had been banished from her own home) and was pleased to have found two new companions... even if they were a little blood-thirsty. Hansel Dee and Hansel Dum spent the rest of their days acting as gate-keepers for the candy cottage and were never in want of food (or kindness) ever again. They all lived together as happily as possible._

_The End._

* * *

"W-well? What did you think?" Alice's brow knit together, her apprehension growing with the twins' silence.

"Read it again!" Dee threw his arms in the air.

"Again! Again!" Dum chanted. The boys joined hands and began to spin around Alice. Then, a familiar voice cut the celebration short.

**Author's Note:**** Thank you all so much for your follows, favorites, and reviews. I appreciate your support and your honest opinions! I always feel hesitant when I post a new story or chapter because it is impossible to know how it will be received. So when I get an email alert about your faves and follows (and reviews, of course!), I feel a little more confident in my writing and want to continue to work hard on these stories. Thank you all, again, from the bottom of my heart!**

**Now, about this story... It was a lot of fun trying to pick the right story for the right character, but also a little challenging! Dee and Dum's story, however, was pretty immediate. I did change some of the original storyline to suite the characters (and my own ideas), and I will continue to do so in the future. So if something seems different or off about theses fairy tales, it was probably intentional.**

**(Sorry that was so long!)**


	3. Elliot's Story

"What the hell?! You rotten brats!" Elliot barreled over to where they all now stood. "I thought I told you twerps to quit fooling around or we'll dock your pay!"

The twins balled their fists and stood up on their tip-toes, ready to square-off with the towering blonde. "You can't order us around, Chicken Rabbit!"

"Yeah! **You're **not our boss- **you **can't cut our pay!" Both Dee and Dum stretched their mouths into grotesque shapes with their fingers.

Seeing Elliot's shoulders quake, Alice touched a gentle hand to his arm. "I'm sorry, Elliot! It was my fault. You see... I was reading the boys a story and kept them from their work." His eyes grew wide. "What?"

The hare gave a brief shake of his head and began to laugh. "Sorry, Alice! It's just, I can't believe you got these two turds to sit still long enough to listen to a story!" As his laughter poured forth, the twins looked on in annoyance. Alice couldn't help but smile as well. She was pleased to see that Elliot's anger had been defused before matters grew worse.

When his laughter had subsided, Elliot took a seat on the ground and laid back against the tree Alice had just occupied. "Bah. I'm exhausted! I've been loaded down with paperwork all day..." He dragged a hand through his hair before he spied the discarded book. "What's that?"

"Duuuuh, Dumb Bunny!" Dee snatched the book off the ground. "It's the Lady's book that she was readin' to **us**!"

Alice raised her hands, prepared to stop another fight, when Dum intervened. "The Lady should read another story to **all **of us!" The mouths of the other three people fell open in shock.

"Brother! What're you...?"

Dum drew Dee aside, out of earshot from Alice and Elliot. "Ssssh! Think about it... If we have the Lady read a story to that Pissy Rabbit, we won't hafta' go back to work." Dee nodded in agreement. Their smiles gleamed with mischief.

"Dee? Dum?" Alice called out to them. The boys ran back, eager to see their plan unfold.

"Read another story!" Taking Alice by the shoulders, Dee forced her to sit down beneath the tree. The twins then settled on either side of Elliot to keep him in place. He looked from one boy to the other and raised a confused eyebrow.

Alice pursed her lips. "Elliot, are you okay? Would you rather go lie down for a while?" In the past, she had seen countless faceless employees swarm around the mafia's second-in-command with stacks of documents. The thought of so much work falling on one person's shoulders nearly overwhelmed her.

"Aw, Alice! You sure are a doll," his violet eyes softened at the sight of her hesitant face. "But it's okay! It'd be nice to just sit back and hang out with you for a while. Er, that is, if you don't mind reading us a story!" The outsider felt her heart jump inside her chest when she saw a blush spread across Elliot's face. It was hard to resist when he looked so darn cute!

"S-sure!" She began to tear through the pages, unable to conceal her embarrassment. In her hurry, she nearly passed the story she had been seeking. "Here we go! This story is called 'Cinderella'..."

"Wait, Lady! Tell it like you told the other story!" The twins nearly toppled Elliot over in their excitement.

"Yeah! Make it about one of us!" Dee exclaimed, jabbing a thumb at his chest.

"Okay, okay. Let's see," Alice pondered over the story for a few moments, until inspiration struck. "This story is called 'Cinder-Elliot'..."

* * *

"Cinderella"...

... or "Cinder-Elliot"

_Two friends, one a faceless man and the other a role-holder, were caught in the midst of a fierce street fight. Eventually, the man with no face fell. He knew that he was nearing his end and called his only ally to his side. "Elliot," he said, "I need you to destroy my clock. I don't want to come back as someone else. Once you've broken the clock, bury it where no one else will find it. Just know, I'll always be looking out for you."_

_Right then, he lay still and breathed his last breath._

_The man with the rabbit-ears watched helplessly as his friend turned into a clock before his very eyes. Ever-loyal to those he loved, Elliot used the butt of his gun to smash the clock beyond repair. Collecting the pieces that remained, Elliot ran as far as his feet could carry him. When he could run no further, he buried the clock and its parts deep in the ground and made a grave for his departed comrade._

_However, destroying a clock was considered the worst possible crime in all the land. When the clockmaker learned of what Elliot had done, he ordered that he be imprisoned for life. And so Elliot was locked away._

_Soon, word spread 'round the country and captured the attention of a powerful nobleman. The nobleman was a man of immense wealth, but few trusted friends. The idea of freeing the hare and making him his right-hand stoked the man's curiosity._

_"What d'ya need with a stupid rabbit, Boss?!" The nobleman's gatekeepers whined. Despite their youth, the twin boys had proven themselves to be capable guards. Above all else, though, it was their childish antics and violent nature which amused the nobleman and kept them on his payroll._

_"Come now, boys..." The nobleman nonchalantly waved his hand to dismiss their objections. "I could use a second-in-command to lighten the workload around here. That, and the rabbit intrigues me. To break a clock is quite a crime. Having someone that daring at my side could be interesting." Setting his top-hat on his head, the man strode away towards the prison._

* * *

Alice tried to stifle a yawn, setting the book aside to cover her mouth.

"Are you tired?" Elliot tilted his head to one side, his ears drooping. "You don't have to keep reading... Not that I don't like your story! 'Cause I do! Really!"

"It's alright, Elliot," the young foreigner laughed. "Though I am glad to hear that you like the story so far..."

"Definitely! I especially like the part where-"

"Stuff it, Bunny!" Both Dee and Dum clapped their hands over the hare's mouth, causing him to fall backwards flailing his arms and legs.

"Yeah! We wanna hear the rest of the Lady's story," Dee snapped. Once Elliot had stilled himself, the twins released him.

Elliot rubbed the back of his neck. "Damn brats."

Alice rolled her eyes before retrieving the book. "Now where did I leave off..."

* * *

_In the furthest depths of the prison, Elliot sat shackled in irons. He had lost track of the number of time changes that had passed since his incarceration. Suddenly, a series of gunshots rang out in the haunting silence. Elliot raised his head to peer out his cell. He immediately recognized the visitor at his door._

_"What the hell do you want, Blood Dupre?" _

_The man only smirked, unfazed by Elliot's hostility and the approaching guards. "Do you want to leave this place?"_

_"What?"_

_"I asked if you would like to leave your prison? Just say the word.." the Hatter whipped around to gun down three guards about to draw their weapons, "...and I can take you away from here."_

_Elliot had heard countless stories about the merciless nobleman, Blood Dupre, and his criminal activities. Never would he have imagined that the notorious Hatter would break him out of prison._

_"Why're you helping me?"_

_Leaving behind a bloody pile of clocks, Blood pulled a key from his coat pocket and opened the door to Elliot's cell. "I am in need of a right-hand man, someone I can trust." With another turn of the key, the clamps fell away from Elliot's neck and wrists. "So what do you say?"_

_The hare rose to his feet, turning the proposition over in his head. It was all so sudden and unexpected that he wasn't sure __**what **__to do. So the Hatter trusted him. But could he trust the Hatter? The only other person he had ever dared to believe in was gone..._

_"Fine. I'll take the job, but on one condition." As Elliot cast him a cautionary look, Blood's smile widened. "When the time comes, I want you to kill me and smash my clock for good. Ya got that?" He shoved his hand towards the nobleman._

_"Of course," Blood took the hand that was offered to him and gave it a firm shake. Instantly, Elliot's face broke into a broad grin._

_The nobleman brought the hare home with him, much to the displeasure of the gatekeepers._

_"Is this stupid rabbit gonna sit with us at the table?" scoffed Tweedle Dee._

_"Ewwww! He's all dirty and covered in blood," Tweedle Dum offered- which was quite ridiculous, considering how often the twins themselves were smeared with the blood of their victims."You can go sit with the maids!" The twins laughed as they hustled Elliot out of the dining room and into the kitchen._

_From that moment onward, the poor hare was obliged to do hard labor. As one time period faded into the next, Elliot was loaded down with paperwork, made to clean-up after the twins' messes, and answer the nobleman's every beck and call. Still not satisfied, the Tweedles inflicted on him every vexation they could think of. They teased him mercilessly and painted various parts of the mansion, so that he would have to wash the walls afterwards. The boys even tossed Elliot's personal belongings among the ashes, forcing him to sit down and pick them out again. And for that reason, the March Hare always looked dusty and dirty; the twins soon took to calling him Cinder-Elliot._

_One day the nobleman had to travel to the local amusement park for business. Feeling unusually generous- after all, he really was a selfish jerk- he asked the gatekeepers what he should bring home for them._

_"A grenade!" said Dee._

_"They don't sell those."_

_"Oh," the boy paused a moment to reconsider, "A water-gun then!"_

_"Me too!" said Dum._

_"And what about you, Cinder-Elliot?"_

_"Blood..." Cinder-Elliot's eyes began to glisten. In all the time they had spent together, never had the Hatter thought to give him a gift. "I hear the amusement park has some real good carrot dishes!"_

_After the negotiations, the nobleman perused the stands that lined the amusement park. For the Bloody Twins, he bought a red water-gun and a blue water-gun. It was on his way home that he realized he had forgotten to buy Cinder-Elliot's present. Just then, a carrot dangling from a tree grazed against him and knocked his hat off. Despite his minor irritation and all-consuming curiosity- for what reason would someone hang a carrot from a tree? - he snapped the carrot off the string and took it with him._

_When he arrived at Hatter Mansion, Blood gave the twins what they had asked for, and to Cinder-Elliot he gave the carrot that had been hung from the tree. Elliot stared down at the carrot in his hand, a smile growing on his face. Though it wasn't exactly a carrot dish, it was still a gift from Blood. And so, Cinder-Elliot thanked him and went to his friend's grave. There he planted the carrot, where it took root and began to grow._

_Cinder-Elliot went to the grave every day to speak to his fallen comrade and tend to the budding plant. Eventually, the plant grew into a grand tree, a carrot tree in fact! (Though really this makes no sense at all, considering that carrots grow in the ground and not from trees. But, then again, it can't be any more weird than __**everything else **__about Wonderland!)_

_Now it happened that the Queen of Hearts proclaimed a ball was to be held at the palace, to which all the eligible young men in the country were invited, in order that her daughter might choose a husband. _

_When Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum discovered that they would be attending the ball with the nobleman, they were in high spirits._

_"A day off, Brother!" Dee rejoiced._

_"And it's free, Brother!" Dum took of Dee's hands and they began to dance around the courtyard, chanting over and over._

_"No work an' free food! We love the ball or whatever it is!" _

_The Twins called Cinder-Elliot over and ordered that he help them prepare for the ball. He was made to brush their hair, clean their shoes, and fasten their buckles. The poor hare sadly obeyed, wishing that he too could attend that ball. When both Tweedles were dressed and ready, Cinder-Elliot appealed to the nobleman to let him go._

_"You, Cinder-Elliot?" Blood said. "That isn't possible. There is too much work to be done. Now, we shall be home just past midnight." Thereupon, the nobleman turned his back on him and stalked off with the two proud gatekeepers._

_The hare heaved a sigh of defeat and trudged over to his private carrot tree. As usual, he watered the roots that had taken hold deep within his friend's grave and began to speak aloud. "Hey man... I hope you're happy wherever it is you are. It sure as hell beats this place. Nothin' against Blood- he's actually a great guy, one of the best I've ever met- but I feel like I'm stuck. Same routine everyday- wake up, clean up after those damn brats, sign documents, take-out a coupl'a faceless, on and on and on... This ball was a chance to do something different. I guess I'm outta luck, though."_

_A soft rustling sounded overhead. Elliot looked up to find a dove perched on the carrot tree. The small bird threw down a handsome white suit, embellished with silk and silver pinstripes, and polished shoes to match. Without pausing to question this turn of events, Elliot quickly dressed himself and ran straight to Heart Castle._

_Upon arriving, Cinder-Elliot scoured the crowd for any sign of the nobleman and his gatekeepers. Surely they would recognize him were they to see him! Despite the careful steps he took, however, the poor hare still managed to attract attention._

_"Ouch!" came a startled cry._

_In his hurry, Elliot had stepped on the foot of the Princess! "Ah! I'm so sorry!"_

_The petite blonde looked the hare over, her eyes coming to rest on his crest-fallen ears. "I-it's quite alright," a blush crept over her cheeks. "Perhaps you would honor me with a dance?" His ears immediately pricked up at her invitation._

_"Sure!" All of his anxiety washed away as he slid a gloved hand around her waist. Drawing the girl close, Elliot breathed in an intoxicating sweet smell, like honeysuckle and jasmine- not exactly carrot cake, but still appetizing! They twirled around in circles, occasionally stepping on each other's foot; though neither seemed to mind. They were perfectly out of sync._

_Whether it was the dancing or his nerves, Elliot couldn't tell, but his face grew warmer and the room became stifling. Daring to glance down, his face turned bright red. The Princess was staring- at him! Or... was she?_

_"That's it! I can't hold back anymore!" Before Elliot could bat an eye, the Princess had grabbed hold of his ears and began yanking._

_"Ow, ow, ow, ow! Stop it! Let go!" Tears threatened to fall as Cinder-Elliot squinted against the pain. He wondered just how the hell such a tiny girl could muster such a strong grip?!_

_The Princess released her victim, wiping her brow. "Sorry, sorry. I'll be gentler." She began to stroke his ears. "Your ears are just so cute... and so soft... I couldn't help myself." Her hand gave a slight twitch, itching to grab the man's ears once more._

_Even though his ears were aching, a small part of Cinder-Elliot wanted to smile. Here he was, a criminal, dancing with the Princess! Her laugh, her smell, her touch... She had her pick of any man here- hell, she could even have Blood! - but she had chosen to dance with him and share these precious treasures with him alone._

_The music slowed to a waltz, washing out the crowd, the palace, and the rest of the world. Unable to hold himself back, Cinder-Elliot bent his head down so that it was mere inches away from that of the Princess. She flushed a brilliant shade of pink, but held Elliot's gaze. His lips brushed against hers, soft as a psalm. It was a gentle, adoring kiss at first. His mouth catching and releasing hers with several sweet pecks. Then it deepened, his mouth less forgiving. Hungry. Once her lips were caught between his own, he refused to let her go. However, time was a terribly cruel thing..._

_In the distance, a grand clock rang out twelve times. Elliot's eyes shot wide open. With great effort, he broke apart from the Princess. "S-sorry, Princess! I gotta go!" The hare darted off so fast that the Princess could not keep up._

* * *

"What a dumb bunny!" Dee hollered.

"Yeah!" Dum chimed in. "If it'd been **me**, I woulda' stayed and done a whole lot more..."

"If it'd been **us**, we woulda' ..."

"Shaddup, you little perverts!" Elliot brought a reprimanding fist down on each boy's head. "This is Alice's story. She's a lady and would never do any of that weird stuff you two might have in mind!"

"Weird stuff...? We didn't say nothin'," Dum folded his arms across his chest in defense.

"We're just kids, ya pervy rabbit!" Dee retorted.

Alice slammed the book shut. "Enough!" The young foreigner's brow pulsed in irritation, her face so red that it would put a tomato to shame. "I will **not **read anymore if you continue this line of conversation."

Her audience hung their heads well below their shoulders.

"Alright then," Alice picked up the book and returned to her original page. "As I was saying..."

* * *

_Cinder-Elliot ran all the way home, casting off the lavish garments and tucking them under his carrot tree. No sooner had he settled down in front of the fireplace, when the Bloody Twins burst through the door._

_"Can you believe that we got to dance with the Princess, Brother?!" Tweedle Dee hooked his brother's arm in his own, spinning him around the kitchen as if they were dancing._

_"She sure was pretty!" Dum paused for a moment, his bottom lip suddenly protruding. "'But we only got to dance with her once! Some jerk kept hoggin' the Princess for the rest of the night."_

_Though he remained seated, Elliot's ears shot up straight into the air._

_"Hn. She is nothing more than a tease, using her wiles to manipulate those poor bastards at the ball," Blood stepped into the room, his face wrought with a dark humor. "Then again, I'll bet her highness isn't above spreading her honey around to get what she wants..."_

_"She's not like that!"_

_The room fell silent. Blood cocked his eyebrow, unsure whether he was more intrigued or concerned with the hare's outburst._

_"What're ya talkin' about, stupid rabbit? __**You **__weren't at the ball!" Dum jeered, his lips curling around the words in a devilish smile._

_"I-I just mean, uh, she's a princess! A lady! Ladies don't normally do pervy things," Cinder-Elliot curled closer to the fire, shying away from the others' interrogation. Thinking no more on the subject, the twins returned to ordering the hare about. Blood settled into a chair. He stared intently at the place where Cinder-Elliot had sat, curious as to how his subordinate's night had truly fared._

_Following the ball, life returned to it's normal routine at the nobleman's estate. Then, one day, Heart Castle released a royal proclamation. The decree announced that the Princess had chosen a suitor to whom she would be wed. "No other shall become my betrothed but he whose ears are cuddly and soft."_

_The two gatekeepers were outraged, for they both had ears like most other men. They traipsed through the house and the garden looking for anything which they might use to construct false ears. Then they remembered Cinder-Elliot. Without the slightest hesitation, both boys brandished their axes and chased down the poor hare._

_"C'mere ya dumb bunny! We won't hurt you!"_

_"Yeah! We just wanna have some fun!"_

_"Like hell!" After running several loops around the grounds, Elliot ducked away inside the basement._

_The Princess soon arrived with the Queen, the Prime Minister, and a troop of guards in tow. Forgetting all about their target, the twins slung their arms around the Princess._

_"It's the Princess!" squealed Dee._

_"We've missed you since the ball!" Dum nuzzled the Princess's shoulder._

_The Prime Minister immediately dove between the gatekeepers and the Princess, unable to bear their affectionate greeting. "You noisy little brats! How dare you contaminate the Princess with your germs!" He began wiping the Princess down with a wet wipe. Before anyone could object, a ruby scepter came crashing down atop the Prime Minister's head._

_"That is enough, White. We'll not have you making a scene," the Queen brushed past the rest of her party. "We have caused you trouble, Dupre. Our apologies."_

_The nobleman gave a slight bow of his head. "Not at all, your majesty. To what do we owe the pleasure?" As he raised himself upright, his eyes flickered to the Princess. He was not able to hold back his smirk as she flushed in irritation._

_Unaware of the unspoken altercation, Vivaldi took the Princess by the shoulders. "Our darling daughter, Princess Alice, has chosen her future husband. However, the oaf left before she could learn his name. We are visiting each household until we find him." Her eyes scanned the room. "It seems the fool was a man with tawny rabbit ears. Are all of the eligible males who attended the ball present?"_

_"No," said the nobleman. "There is only my second-in-command, a former criminal as it were, but he cannot possibly be the man you seek." The nobleman folded his arms, ducking his head so that his fringe curtained his eyes._

_"Send for him."_

_All eyes fell on Alice, her jaw rigid with determination. But the twins answered, "Oh no. You don't wanna see him. He's too dirty!" Peter White blanched slightly at their words. However, Alice was absolutely set in her decision, and they were obliged to summon Cinder-Elliot._

_When he had washed his hands and face, he went up to the Princess and bowed. Alice reached out her hand to stroke his ears, her eyes alighting at the feel of his fur underneath her fingers. And when Cinder-Elliot stood up and the Princess looked into his face, she recognized the mysterious stranger that she had danced with at the ball. "It's you! This is the man I choose!"_

_Alice flung her arms around Cinder-Elliot's neck and he held her in his arms, lifting her off the ground into a twirl._

_When the wedding day came, the nobleman and his gatekeepers were welcomed with open arms. Elliot was all too pleased to grant them favors and let them take part in his good fortune. Though no one ever learned of the offense Blood had laid against the Princess, she was willing to set aside her animosity for the sake of her groom and his happiness._

_And so Elliot and the Princess lived many years with his family in (relative) peace and joy._

* * *

Alice rested the book once more in her lap. The sun had already set and night was encroaching on the expanse of sky above. She thought of Julius and how worried he would be when she didn't turn up. Well, as worried as he could be with his nose buried in his dozens upon dozens of clocks.

"That was awesome!" Elliot exclaimed, rising to his feet and patting himself off. He extended a hand to Alice, helping her to her feet.

"Your stories are the best, Lady!" Dee took hold of her arm, leading her towards the mansion.

"Well, well, well. What have we hear?" An unseen voice drawled from behind.

**Author's Note: WOW. That turned out much longer than I had intended. So sorry for the wait! This story started out simple enough, but because I wanted to stay (somewhat) true to the original Grimm's version, it became a little more complicated and harder to finish. I hope you enjoy this and, as always, thank you for all of the favorites, follows, and comments!**


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